“The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to
endure, to transform, to love and to be greater than our suffering.” – Ben Okri
Suicide is a very sensitive subject, but I wanted to bring it up for those who might know someone thinking about taking their own life. No question, all of us run into times in our life where we think it might be easier to check out than it would be to face whatever’s causing us to think about committing such a fatal act. The act of suicide is hard to think about and deal with for everyone involved; (1) the person committing the act, and (2) those who have to live with the matter after the act is done. Why do people take their own lives? A variety of reasons, such as depression, debt, addiction, hopelessness, loneliness, poverty, dowry, frustration, fear, mental illness, loosing the purpose of living, incurable health problems, physical or sexual abuse, just to name a few. WHO can’t related to experiencing any one (or more) of those feelings once or twice in their life? We all can, right? Well, what can we say to someone who’s considering taking their own life? If it were coming from me, here’s what I would have to say to that person:
Suicide is a selfish act. No question. Unfortunately, you’re not using your selfishness in the right way. Your using it to end your life, when you should be using it to survive, enhance and/or begin a new life. No matter your circumstance(s), yes, you are entitled to feel the way you do. But, do not let those feelings determine your outcome. There is hope and reason for you to live. For starters, there are more reason for you to stay alive than not. Second, I do not know your situation, but I would say this, if you have the right to choose to end it all, you have the right to drop everything, start over, get help, disappear, back out, move away, change your name, learn a new skill to make other monies, and/or allow time to bring you a way out under any of those options as I just described. Depending on your situation again, there’s always help available, there’s always an answer somewhere, there’s always a way out somehow, there’s always a chance you’d be happier if you would just give your situation time, treatment, and/or made the decision to back out, walk away, or leave the scene that’s causing you such harm. Screw B.S. You’re far more important. No situation is ever worth dying over. It’s just not. [Unless it’s your country or to save the lives of those you love in a fire or something.] Life is absolutely worth living AND on your own terms, your way, and without negotiation.
Again, your situation is unique to you, and I respect that. I just want you to know how much I care, how much others care, and how much you too should care about living your own life your way. If all you need is time to heal or a time to flee, so be it. You’re also a lot tougher than you give yourself credit for. Remember what they say? What doesn’t give, makes you stronger? What’s more, how can you become a problem solver where your life counts. Everyone asks for help when they need it, so don’t be afraid to ask for it. In almost ever instance, that help is also FREE too! So, what stops you from choosing LIFE? If you happen to be living in a mental/emotional/physical/financial prison, then simply plan your escape to a new life. Give it time, and you will win. If you’re living with a mental illness or alcohol/drug addiction, get help immediately. If you’re in debt, embrace it, roll your sleeves up and get out of it or file for bankruptcy. Start a business, forget about a J.O.B. (Just Over Broke) and serve others to get up and out of your debt.
No matter what you’re going through right now, fire up your heartstrings for living life on your own terms, and dig yourself out of your situation no matter how long it takes. There’s a whole world out there for you to see. It’s just waiting to serve you, make you smile, laugh and create a thousand memories of life here on Earth before we all check out by natural means. All it takes is you to say, “Yes,” to life, and “No,” to whatever B.S. is causing you harm or influencing you to think about leaving us. Again screw B.S., choose life. Life’s worth living it to its fullest for your sake, selfishly speaking. Oh, and again, on your own terms! BYE to B.S. BYE to taking one’s life, and HELLO TO LIFE!”
Again, I don’t know this person’s situation. I don’t know their history. I don’t know what lead up to wanting to think about ending their life. I just know, if they’re going to think selfishly about taking their own life, then they can think selfishly about surviving and living life elsewhere and under different circumstances that relieve them from such pressures. They can take their pain, their sorrow, their depression, and get pissed, pumped, and motivated to get up and out or do something pro-active about their scene. This book alone has over 700 ways to overcome B.S. Surely, there’s enough fuel and ideas provided herein to help gather such strength, muster, and will to stand up to anyone giving them B.S., and then some.
What’s more, no person, circumstance, event, or otherwise, is worth throwing away the one opportunity we have to live life on our own terms just the way we want to. Anyone around us who doesn’t agree with that perspective, needs to take a step back and let us walk right out the door. “BYE!” Always say to yourself, “My life is important. I will overcome. I will get the help I need. There is help out there. I choose to live. No one’s going to bring me down anymore. Life to me is precious. It’s mine. I love it, and pledge not to end it, but to begin anew, elsewhere if I have to. I don’t need anyone to believe in me, as I believe in myself and that’s all I need to survive and live.”
Other ways to help someone in this situation, for example, someone who’s experienced the horrors of war, might be to commit themselves to serving others FULL-TIME. For starters, it preoccupies the mind when they’re involved with other people’s lives. Second, the joy and warmth of helping others can help sooth a warn tarn soul. On that note, there are hundreds of people right around all of us who are waiting to meet you and experience your care and your involvement. Without hesitation, heal yourself by going to their aid and serving them. They will serve you in ways you could never help yourself; to find peace and love for life now and forever.
If someone suffers from drug and/or alcohol substance abuse, getting treatment is a must and as soon as possible. Sobriety and getting off drugs is the only answer to living a full life.
In other circumstances, if you’re healthy and able, and don’t want to harm yourself, you could simply pack your bags, skip town, change your name, and start a new life elsewhere. Hey, that’s not so bad; compared to what you might be going through. If you only have a few years left, for example, you’re in school living at home, be patient. Once you hit a certain age, you’re outta there! Yes, your family and those who love you will miss you and wonder where you went, but better to spare your life, and the grief your family would experience by simply heading out to the highway towards that new life that awaits you. You can always write them a letter from afar saying how much you miss them, that you wish them well, etc. Starting over, elsewhere, is a respectable situation.
Checking out without giving alternatives a try isn’t. At least letting people know (or not) that you’re happy, and living the life you’ve always wanted in a safer environment, well, that’s your choice. See how all this works down to? Choice, and it’s all yours. Choose life, yours, and living it your way, and on your own terms.
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